The Tomb Of the Unknown Soldier

As you may know, I am proud to be an American and find it imperative that we think of those who have shed their blood or lost their lives in service to our country throughout the years. As Christmas approaches and we prepare to celebrate the birth of Christ, I can't help but think of those who have passed.

The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier holds the remains of American soldiers from World Wars I and II, the Korean War, and the Vietnam War. As you may have heard, one set of these remains have been identified bringing peace to one family while many others continue to hope in vain.

I think it important this season to remember all of those missing men and women and their families in our prayers. For while we spend time within the warm bosom of our families, they remain one short.

Be thankful for their sacrifice and commitment to the founding beliefs of our country. Be thankful for their bravery. Have a very Blessed Christmas.

US Navy Drill Team

This video is amazing. It is of the US NAVY SILENT DRILL TEAM. About three years ago, our US Navy Ceremonial Guard Silent Drill Team was invited to compete in an International Tattoo in Norway.The Navy competed against military units from all over NATO and won first place. Once you see the video you'll understand why they won. It made me very proud to know that my husband is part of this amazing organization. Enjoy!

http://www.whc.net/rjones/USN/USN_team.html

Obama Signs New Bill that Benefits Spouses of Active Duty!

I recently received information from my FRO (Family Readiness Officer) that Obama has signed a bill that will give the opportunity to spouses of all Active Duty personnel to claim their original home state on their taxes even after they have moved to a new duty station.

For example: when my husband received orders to North Carolina, I changed my home of record from California to Montana where he also has his home of record at. In Montana, my husband, as long as he is active duty, does not have to pay state taxes.

When I began working in North Carolina, I was required to pay North Carolina state tax even though it was not my home of record or where I hold my drivers license. This bill now changes that! I can now pay my taxes in Montana rather than North Carolina!

Each state does vary on income tax so you should check your home state's taxes before you voluntarily change your state on your taxes. Good luck!

Military Perks

Being in the military can be a sacrifice at times. So why not take advantage of some perks that come with having a military id? There are many stores and websites that will give military personnel and their dependents a good discount. For example, Lowes and Home Depot both provide a 10% discount on all merchandise with a military ID.

I found this great website, www.cinchouse.com, that is specifically for women married to a service member or women in uniform. If you are engaged to someone in the military or are in the military yourself and engaged, go to this website for an entry to win a FREE wedding dress. There are quite a few bridal stores that are providing the gowns.

I would love any feedback on other perks so leave some ideas in the comments section!

Thank Our Troops!

I recently received an email from an aunt of mine regarding what Xerox is doing lately for our troops. You can go to their website http://www.letssaythanks.com/ and pick out a style of post card to be sent to a random military personnel over seas. You can pick a prewritten message or create one of your own for the card. This is free and a great way to show your appreciation for the men and women that are serving our country right now while spending the upcoming holidays away from family and friends. Let's let them know that we all appreciate their service to our country. It only takes a moment of your time and I know it will be much appreciated!

Keeping Veteran's Day All Year

Too many times, our veterans are overlooked; their sacrifice under appreciated. Celebrating our veterans can be an all year activity rather than just a one time a year half-hearted reminder. Let our veterans know you are thankful for the time they spend away from their families and spend the holidays overseas with only their comrades as companions.

I have been blessed in my life to be able to appreciate two veterans in my life today. My father-in-law who began his service to our great country when he was just eighteen years old during the Vietnam War. His sacrifice and experience throughout his twenty three years in the Marine Corps made it possible for those less blessed than us to have more freedoms in their lives. My husband is the other veteran in my life that I never forget to thank. Although I am the one that is left behind, I understand that what he does has a greater purpose than just living the selfishness of our own lives.

So, try not to take your own veterans for granted. Let them know you care in the little ways that count. Thank them for their sacrifice and willingness to serve our country. For those veterans that have served in past wars, don't let a day go by without letting them know that you appreciate what they have done for this country from both World Wars, the Korean War, Vietnam, Desert Storm, as well as the battles we continue to fight today. Be thankful for their service, for without the men and women willing to serve and protect this country, we would not be who and what we are today. Imagine, we could all be speaking German today under a repressed Hitler like government where fear would rule our every action! What an amazing thing our civil rights are- the one thing that our military fights every day for!

Keeping Your Marriage Strong

As a military spouse, you will find that there are times that your marriage is in danger of "falling apart", whether this is from deployment schedules, daily stresses, or just that as you grow as an individual your growth patterns lead in different directions. Keeping your marriage strong should be a daily routine. Effective communication is key as well as remembering to be realistic in how you "see" your marriage.

I have been through three deployments each of varying lengths in the eight years of being with my husband. These do not include the short spurts of time that he leaves for training exercises. Those times apart change both you and your spouse and you have to remember to be realistic when it comes to how your relationship will be when he returns. Both you and he have changed during those times apart and it takes time to re-acclimate when he returns home from a long time apart.

Some things I try to do with my own husband are: Do not to sweat the little things! If he does something annoying that grates on your nerves (they all do it!) either let it roll off of your shoulders like water or address it in an effective way. Don't blow up at him! Too many times our communication becomes ineffective when we get worked up and we lose it. Remember to keep your cool. Keep a date night every week where you do something for you two- leave the family concerns at home and concentrate on your connection to your spouse. Remember that there is more to life than just going through it by rote and try to communicate in an effective manner- talk to them, not at them.

Unchecked stresses that are not "fixed" can cause a marriage to fall apart. If you feel that your marriage is in danger of this, you should find a good marriage counselor that can teach both you and your partner how to make your marriage as strong as it can be.

Remember that marriage is not easy, but a marriage to a military personnel is the hardest because we are the ones that have to become both mom and dad at the drop of a hat putting our spouses duties on our own shoulders. This is enough to drive anyone insane!

Supplements

Every time I have spoken with any type of trained health professional, they always stress the importance of taking quality supplements. In this day in age, we are not able to get the nutrients that our bodies need to stay healthy. I truly believe that our bodies were made to be able to heal themselves to a certain extent. But not without the proper nutrients.

I have recently begun taking quality supplements, and they have been life changing. I have struggled with insomnia as far back as I can remember and I am now on a better sleep schedule because of this amazing all natural supplement. I have more energy which is so important when your spouse is away and you are essentially a single parent. Check it out!

Cleaning Strategies for the Clutter Bug!

This is a great article on making your messes not look so messy! www.5000moms.com/Home/?p=442. I don't know about any of you, but I find that I do not have enough hours in the day to completely clean my home or even keep it tidy throughout the week. For me, this messy problem aggravates me and causes my anxiety to kick up a notch. This in effect makes me shorter of temper. I have had to "retrain" myself on the importance of not sweating the little stuff and when I do not have time to completely clean up the mess to at least make a dent in it- even when I don't feel like it.

Dealing with grief

In light of the recent violence at Ft. Hood and in Orlando, I thought I would share this post from our sister blog: http://www.5000moms.com/Soul/?p=192. How sad it is too see things like this happen. My heart goes out to all those affected by this or any other tragedy.

Fall Projects Ideas

As the holidays begin to draw closer, we find ourselves turning to ideas for fun decorations that are thrifty. We all live with budgets, some of us on tighter ones than others. Use this opportunity to let out your creative side (or discover it for the first time)! Take a few minutes to search the web for free fall activities to do with your children and make this season a fun one. Try collecting the mulit-colored leaves that have fallen to the ground to make a fall inspired collage to send to your family member over seas. You can vary that idea to make a picture frame to send as Christmas gifts this holiday season as well. Open your eyes and take a look around you at all of the things you can use to create wonderful pieces of artwork and decorations. A great website to refer to for craft ideas that is free is http://www.artistshelpingchildren.org/. They provide great activity ideas for all ages (adults too!) that are fun, easy, and inexpensive. So, take a break from the television, pull out those art supplies, and have fun!

Letters

It's so easy to send email or pick up the phone. But there is something so romantic about letter writing (the old fashioned kind). I anticipate the time every week that I get a letter from my husband. I feel like it is easier to express what I am truly feeling when I am actually hand writing something. Like I am really putting a piece of me into every envelope.

It helps our loved one who are away from us as well. My husband's uncle is a Navy Commander and he said that the guys that did the best in Officer Candidate School received the most letters. It boosts their morale so much and let's them know that they have not been forgotten.

Take time while your spouse is away to make it a sort of hobby. There are classes that you can take and books you can read on how to cultivate your letter writing skills.

Take Time

This is an awesome post about taking time for what is most important.
www.5000moms.com/Business/?p=89

Why Yo Yo Dieting Does Not Work

In today's society, the fad of yo yo dieting is a repeating issue. Women are hopping on the "diet" train in the hopes of losing pounds and inches. In the end we tend to give up the "diet" because we feel unsuccessful or maybe it has worked for a while but your body is no longer changing. What happens after the "diet" is over and you go back to your regular eating ways? Most of us gain the weight and inches back plus some which tends to cause a downward spiral in the way we see ourselves. Our self image may be even worse than before we began the "diet".
Obesity has become a major problem in America with the availability of prepackaged foods and fast food restaurants that make quick meals possible. These are not healthy for your body! The consumption of these items with the addition of lack of physical movement causes your body to store all of the added calories you consume but don't use.
The rule: I don't "diet"! First you must relearn what "diet" truly means. A diet by definition is not about deprivation or starvation. It is how and what you eat on a normal day to day basis. For example: if you are diabetic, you will follow a special diet in order to be healthy such as measuring your foods and watching your sugar intake along with counting your carbohydrate intake. A diet is a lifestyle change that you must be prepared to follow for life. It's about re-educating yourself in how and what to properly eat.
Dieting Pills don't work! Many make claims that are untrue. We try them with the hope to lose weight quickly to either satisfy ourselves or our partners. Healthy weight loss begins with a healthy self image and love for yourself. Losing weight should be about you not anyone else. It is a very personal and private voyage in which we learn to respect ourselves and accomplish our goals in life.
Losing weight should be done with small changes over a long period of time, not over night. In the past four years between the births of two children I am healthier than I have ever been. I don't deprive myself of fast food and chocolate. Instead, and learned to limit myself to how often I consume those items. Recently, a friend of mine that I have not seen in five years came to visit and she couldn't believe how great I looked. I was amazed! I see myself every day, so I was unaware of how far I have come in the past years.
Healthy self image is the key. Too often we see these women in magazines that are size 0 or we go shopping and nothing fits our frames correctly. You must learn to tell yourself that your body may not be made to be that size. Mine sure isn't. Get realistic with your goals and don't let anyone else's version of what you look like be what you guide yourself with. This should be about you not anyone else! www.Shape.com is a great place to get good recipes and weight loss tips. They also have a great work out goals worksheet and calendar that you can track your progress.

Exercise

As mom's and as women in general, most of us put ourselves last. But we must remember, in order to care for those around us, we must take care of ourselves first. If we want to be around for our kids and other loved ones for a while, we need to take care of our bodies.

As I said in my previous post, I have struggled with depression most of my life. One of the biggest things that has helped me has been regular exercise. When you exercise, your body releases the chemicals in your brain that make you happy. It also helps me get my mind off of all the things that are bothering me and puts things into a better perspective.

There are so many other benefits to exercise. I could go on and on. So what is the best way to start a program? I love researching online. Think about the areas of your body that you want to work on and research websites for free workouts. One of my favorite sites is www.fitnessmagazine.com. They also have tips for healthy eating. There are simple workouts that you can do at home that are free. You do not have to join a gym.

Another thing to remember when starting a program is to make it a priority. Do not let yourself get caught up in excuses!

Check out this blog for other tips and ideas written by the owner of a pilates studio:

http://www.5000moms.com/Body/?page_id=16

Depression

I read this post on one of my favorite blogs and thought that it correlated so well with LeeAnne's post on depression. I have struggled with depression most of my life and this article really rang true to me. As my dad always says "Keep on Keepin' on!"

http://www.5000moms.com/Soul/?p=169

Fighting the Separation Blues

As a military wife, separations from my spouse are a constant occurrence. I have been married for six years now to a man who plans to make a career of being in the military. In that time, I have had the opportunity to experience three deployments of varying lengths; and I must say they never get any easier.
All those people who say 'don't worry, the time will fly by and the next one will be a piece of cake' do not know what they are talking about! It never gets any easier to see your loved one leave for an undetermined length of time and to now be responsible for not only your own duties as wife and mother, but of father as well.
One thing that I have found that works for me during these stressful times is to keep as busy as possible. You may be thinking 'that's easy for you to say' when you work full time and are only home long enough to eat, get the children into bed and go to sleep yourself; but what about those women whose primary job is within the home in the traditional roles of mother and homemaker, such as myself? Time tends to creep by for those of us who have "nothing" to do except take care of the house and children.
I take up new hobbies during this time of stress and separation and try new things that I may not have done before. If you live near a military installation, there are so many free programs that you can take advantage of that will help you pass the time (IE. go the gym- its free!, use the bowling alley, connect with other women from your squadron or unit). Find a friend and go see a movie one day a week, or even a lunch day when you are connecting with someone else besides your children and you have a break, even if only for a few minutes. Read all of the books that you have been meaning to get around to! Or, you can be like me and begin to write one that may never be finished! (Laughing about that one!). The main point is to find things that you enjoy and do them. Above all, do not entertain feelings of guilt! There is no reason for it.
I also suggest that instead of a daily emailed letter to your spouse overseas that you create works of art on stationary and send it snail mail; at least once a week. During my husband's first deployment he carried no less than three letters at a time in his pockets every day. This is a way for them to be connected to us here at home. You can send your most intimate thoughts this way with the knowledge that only his eyes will see them.
Try getting into the habit of choosing an item a week from your child's artwork or work that has been sent home from school to send to daddy as a way of keeping him involved even though he is not present. You can always let your child or children pick out what items to share making it a fun game for them.
Over all, you must remember to LIVE! Your life does not end when he is away. It must in fact go on with as much normalcy as possible if only so that the transition is easier for your children. It is okay to cry and be sad, however I make it my own practice to not let my children see me break down. Let them see instead the inner strength pour out from you as you fulfill all your daily family business and needs. Before you know it, you will be standing in a crowd waving those flags and holding handmade signs while you wait with pent up breath for the first sight of him.
And much like the parting of the Red Sea, there he will be, striding towards you with just as much joy in his own steps.