Seasonal Depression

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)
I have struggled with this for a while and did not realize it. The symptoms to me were not as noticeable. The more I shared it with others, the more I realized how very common it is.

According to Web MD, the symptoms for SAD are:

• decreased levels of energy
• difficulty concentrating
• fatigue
• increase in appetite
• increased desire to be alone
• increased need for sleep
• weight gain

There are many treatments for this type of depression. Most people that I have talked to about this go tanning for a few minutes at a time once or twice a week. You can also do light therapy and a lot of times, your insurance will pay for the light required for this. If you feel you have this disorder, I strongly suggest you speak to your doctor about possible treatments. There is no reason to suffer through the winter season when there are options available!

When Depression Strikes

Often times, the "beast" sneaks up on us, like a thief in the night, waiting for us to be at our most vulnerable; and then it strikes. Its poisonous fangs digging deeply into our psyche until we feel like we have lost an essential part of ourselves: our identity.

Who we are as moms and wives should never overtake who we are as women. Our identity is constantly changing as we grow, age, and hopefully, become even better people than we were before. We change so gradually, that the "beast" can take root so deeply within ourselves and we do not even realize it until it is too late. The BREAK DOWN occurs, or as I like to say, "I have just lost my mind today."

This "beast" is a little snake called depression. It infiltrates us slowly, manipulating our minds, hearts, and souls; sucking everything we are right out of us. We do not even realize this is happening until one day we snap.

Today, I am focusing on talking about how to avoid the eventual snapping by discussing signs that you may be "losing" yourself as well as some ways to halt the downward slide. I myself have struggled with mild depression for the past 2 1/2 years. I used to teach full time and chose to stay home when my second child was born. At this time, I also became ill. On the one hand, I lost my identity as a career woman, who I had been (a teacher) was no longer my identity. I had become just "a mom". And then, a "sick mom". There is nothing wrong with being "just a mom"; being a mom is one of the most important jobs I will do every day for the rest of my life, and I want to do it as best as I can. However, I was taught since a young age that it was important for me to rely on myself and have a career as well. This mode of thinking can really tear you down when you go from making your own money to relying on your husband to pay all of the bills; especially if you were taught the way of life that both parents worked (which I was). Long story short, I began going to therapy and am on medications to hopefully control my Chron's disease (eventually!), but feel healthier in body, mind, and spirit today than I have since I stopped working full time three years ago.

The "beast" sunk its fangs in deeply and I became so sad, weepy, and just did not want to get out of bed. An identity change can really destroy you if you are not prepared for it. We as women will go through this at some point in our life even if you are not experiencing it now. We as moms cannot let it destroy us. Our children rely on us to be their rocks and be the strong and consistent ones in their lives. We cannot let the "beast" win the wars that rage within us.

Here are some things to watch out for: Crying spells, lethargy, not caring about what is going on in your life, not able to get out of bed, no enjoyment in things you used to enjoy, secluding yourself, and irrational anger.

Here is what you can do about it: Go to see a therapist/counsellor (this is a safe place to talk about what is upsetting you and give you the tools to deal with your life as it is today), find a support group of women, go out and enjoy sunny days, and above all, do not hole up in your home. Make sure you do at least one thing a day (even if that one thing is just taking a shower), when you are the most depressed, that one thing will make you feel like you have accomplished something for the day. Surrounding yourself with bright colors also helps as the winter season comes upon us.

Please feel free to share in the comments section other ideas for dealing with depression. What works to get you out of the blues and silences the "beast"?

Finding a hobby

Aloha from Hawaii! My family and I are finally getting settled into our new home. I'm so exited to be blogging again!

As LeeAnne said in her previous post, we are focusing this month on not losing our identities as mothers, wives, women, etc. I wanted to write a little bit about finding a hobby.

It happens all too often. We wake up one day and think, "I don't know who I am anymore." Which can lead to so many things, depression, mid-life crisis, affairs, etc. I do not want that to happen to me. I think it is so important not only for our sake but for our families sake to take care of ourselves spiritually, emotionally and physically. And having a hobby or working on a talent is such an important part of that.

I grew up taking polynesian dance. I loved it. I excelled in it. It gave me confidence (not to mention a killer work out :)) When I moved to Utah, I could not find anywhere to take it and missed it terribly.

I tried out some other hobbies/talents that my friends enjoyed; scrapbooking, sewing, crafty things. While I had a little fun while I was doing it, I didn't get super excited to do it. Scrapbooking completely overwhelmed me in fact.

When we found out we were being stationed in Hawaii, to say I was excited would be an understatement. I knew that I would definitely find a Halau to dance with here. I started my first class on monday and came home so excited. It is such an uplifting experience to do something that you have a passion for.

I also have joined a group called Stroller Strides. It is so much fun! Stroller strides is a fitness program comprised of moms with stroller age children. They have classes all over the country. You can find a class near you here. It gives me a killer workout and an opportunity to meet other moms.

I challenge you to find or revisit your talent/hobby that you have a passion for and truly enjoy. The options are limitless!

November Focus

Dear Readers,

We are back this fall season and more dedicated than ever to getting those helpful tips out for all of our mothers. This month, we are going to be focusing our posts on the identity crisis that so many mothers eventually face in the process of their lives.

As mothers, we tend to only think about those we are responsible to care for. In doing this, we begin to forget who we are or once were as our identity changes to that of a mother and wife. If you have not been in this place yet, believe me, you will be eventually, so please read our focus posts coming this month about how to "get out of the rut" so to speak.

Some of you know that I was once a full-time teacher. I taught fifth grade and enjoyed it immensely. I became a mother to my first child in 2005 and worked through the first two years of my daughter's life, missing all of her "firsts". When my second child came around in 2007, my husband deployed, and I knew that I could not handle the teaching and caring for a two-year-old and infant by myself without losing my mind. I took year off, intending to return to work after that, but became ill.

Over the past three years, I slowly lost my identity as a teacher and woman who worked out of the home to help provide for her family. In life, we must all make choices and sacrifices for the good of our family, but mine was slowly destroying who I had once been. My illness also took a toll and essentially turned me into a hermit. My identity now is one of mother, wife, and daughter. I lost a part of myself when I could not return to teaching in a classroom. About a year ago, I began going back to church and finding things that interest me in the hopes that I could bring myself out of the "funk" I had slowly slipped into.

My point: As our lifestyle and needs change within our family, so too will our identity. It is imperative that as these changes occur, we find the true things that matter to us and hold onto them. It is natural for us to change as we get older and "wiser", the key is to change in ways that matter to us as women rather than allow changes to occur that we cannot live with; only then can you have hope in your heart and soul for your future. Don't allow the "funk" to take over your life.

Every Friday in November, Shevaun and I will be focusing on how we lose our identity and ways to keep from slipping into the "funk" or how to get out of it. Please let us know in the comments section if there is anything you as readers need help with. We are here not just to provide insights and ideas, but also to be a support of moms! We are moms who understand because we have been there as well. So please, share with us so that we can support all of you in your trying times.